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Brazil 2002 Part Three
It's no banana fun anymore!
"Look the boss asks can you to stop wearing that funny hat!"
"Why, what's wrong with it?"
"He's says there's only room for one looney around here and that's him!"
"Damn! after i spent all my life's savings on this teapot hat, now he tells me?!"
Button shows us his hidden talent...
A very very bad bugs bunny impersination...
"What is up doctor?! what is up?! you know... like what is up?!"
Now we know why it was a hidden talent... best keep it hidden and don't give up the day job anytime soon!
The tifosi came to see thier god...
"Shumy! Shumy! Shumy!!!" Tifosi
And god came to see him too!
"SHUMY!!! SHUMY!!! SHUMY!!!" No.1 Tifoso
The legends are true...
The legendary tyre graveyard
Spot the dog drivers will sign anything...
If they think it'll get them out of a deadend contract.
"Er so how much do i get?"
McBoy and girl...
"Hey baby, i think i've just found your g-spot!"
Joker leaves rotten banana on track!
"Get that rotten thing outta here, before it stinks up the place and attracts flies!"
Monty caught bragging again!
"It's this big!"
"What's that monty?"
"My pussy!"
"???!!!"
Flavio caught!!!
"What the fuck you doing here?!"
"Er nothing!"
"Don't fucking nothing me!"
"No honestly nothing... er i'm doing nothing wierd or kinkiy at all... like i said nothing!"
"You bloody useless liar, your flashing your maggot at the cars again aren't you?! Admit it!"
"No nothing like that honest... not me... not never... i wouldnt' to that... i ain't no pervert... honest!"
"But i bloody well saw you!"
"No that wasn't me that was... that was er... oh yeah... that was my twin sister... that's it my twin sister!"
"Your twin fucking sister?! what do you mean your twin sister?! so tell me, your twin sister has a wrinlkly pork pencil sporting a benetton forever tattoo too?"
"Er yeah... er yeah she has... well she kinda borrowed it... yeah she borrowed it... as i'm not using it at the moment!"
"Yeah right and i'm the queen of sheba!"
"So can i go now your majesty?"
"Er... only if you show me your tattoo!"
"???!!!"
New team, new experiences...
"Ok lads fill her up!"
"Stupid bastards!!! you've given me diesel again!!!"
McBaldy Team...
Use McBaldy tyres!
How come the bar is always crowded....
When you want to get a drink!
Having sold everything else...
McBoys finally try selling themselves...
"How's business?" ron
"Slow!" norby
"Same here!" ron
"Not had a sausage all day!" norby
"I know what you mean... can't understand why though!" ron
"It must be something wrong with what were doing." norby
"Like what?" ron
"Well... like not going public!" norby
"Public? no way... hidding in this McCloset is perfectly ok!" ron
"Shit! i'm dying for a pizza!" norby
"Call it what you like, i ain't going there!" ron
The big and small of it...
"Sorry mate, as your pecker's only this big, we don't stock a relevant car big enough to compensate!"
Meeting of the secret fellowship of the lesser common bastard
"So you're a bastard too?!" eddie
"Yup, the biggest one of them all and proud of it!" ron
"So you're a total bastard then?" eddie
"Yeah and its taken years to get to where i am today!" ron
"Damn and i'm still only a novice!" eddie
"Don't worry about it, Tom here is a bit of a stupid bastard and he's been here only a couple of months!" ron
"Wow, already?!" eddie
"Yeah, took a bit of getting used to, but i soon got the hang of it!" tom
"Great can't wait to become an utter sneaky bastard!" eddie
"Don't run before you can kick someone's crutches away, young bastard me lad! otherwise we'll have to take you round the back and kick the shit out of you!" ron
"You are a total bastard aren't you?!" eddie
"Yup, now put your wallet and your watch on the table and piss off!" ron
"What a professional!" eddie sloping off
Some interviews are made in heaven...
Then again some are made in hell.
"If you ask me about the fucking hat one more time, i'll stick that mike where the sun don't shine!" nikki
"What under your hat?" mr mike
The grass is always greener on the other side of the track...
But it doesn't mean you got to go mow it!
"Damn that's torn it, i think i hit a stone!"
McNish with his number one fan....
Bought from any local hardware store, well anything more would be an extravagance.
"Hi so how long you been a fan?"
"...."
"Shy huh?"
At toycar safety is a major concern...
Note the saftey handle is in easy reach, just incase nishy slips and falls through the toilet seat.
"Hmmmmm this looks like it's going to be a hard one!"
Toycar drivers still have a lot to learn about racing...
Formula one is not a picnic.
"Hey this looks like a nice spot, now where did i put the BBQ?"
When one of your drivers goes for a drink...
And comes back carrying a 1000 gallon drum, he's definately got a problem!
"Can't wait to get this down me neck!"
McPizza Conspsiracy
"Ok i'm here, but i don't see why we had to secretly meet in a dumpster... and then up to our necks in rotting trash!" frank
"Well the reason is its the last place anyone would think of looking... nah tell a lie i like it here, plus we can do lunch at the same time and for free... look, all these lovely half eaten stale pizzas mmmmmmmm!" norby
"You make me sick!" frank
"Oh cool, extra spicey topping!" norby
Some teams haven't a clue...
Bless them.
"Hello pits?!"
"Yup go ahead!"
"Er we've found something on the ground and ain't sure what it is!"
"Ok describe it!"
"Well it's big!"
"Yup!"
"And its kinda flat!"
"Yup!"
"And its rough to the touch!"
"Yup!"
"And its hard!"
"Yup!"
"And it's kinda sticky"
"Yup!"
"And it's made up of loads of other smaller bits stuck together!"
"Yup!"
"And its black!"
"Yup!"
"Ok that'll be the track!"
"Are you sure?"
"Nope!"
"Ok that's good enough for us!"
"Right, now pick it up and try sticking it back on the car from where it dropped off!"
Gunty suffers niggly bowel problems...
Eddie's foot stuck up his arse for giving him a dog of a car!
"Eddie cut your bloody nails next time!"
Mclaren take practice seriously...
And practice walking home to the pits...
Over...
And over...
And over again!
"Thank god these McShoes weren't designed by newey!"
Lightly steamed...
Banana anyone?!
Pele was called in to personally supervise the banner placements
"Perfect! now where's that flag?" pele
It's magic...
Crap banana magic, but magic all the same...
"Nothing in this hand, and nothing in this hand.... thats magic! now for my next trick, i'll make my f1 career dissappear in a puff of bananas!" The not so amazing satodini
Frank and his new luxury home help
"I need to go for a crap!" frank
"Why you telling me?" pele
"Well coz you're supposed to help me!" frank
"What, you want me to poop for you, are you crazy?!" pele
"No i mean you help me to the toilet and help me wipe afterwards!" frank
"No bloody way i'm a striker, not a shit wiper!" pele
"You could have fooled me!" frank
Bernie hires pele as the world's most expensive tumble dryer!
"Ok when i tell you, start the spin cycle!" bernie
"Spin cycle? i don't see no bike here, are you crazy?!" pele
"No you idiot, just start waving my laundry around like a mad man!" bernie
"Are you crazy? i'm pele not superman, how the hell you expect me to lift a laundry and wave it around?!" pele
"Oh God! no just wave my shorts around till they dry!" berine
"Oh i get it, you peepee your pants and you want me to dry them... what you think i am, crazy?!" pele
"No just fucking useless!" bernie
When pele comes visiting everything must go...
Hide!
"What is it?" pele whispers through grin
"Huge cans of petrol" whispered back
"Thankyou, thankyou, i have always wanted huge cans of petrol. i am honoured to accept them!" pele
"You're too kind, so when can i expect you to deliver them... free of course?" pele
"Er no pele you're just posing with them, they're not yours!"
"Oh ok i get it, its the machines... why thankyou thankyou i've always wanted some huge machines. i am honoured to accept them!" pele
"You're too kind, so when can i expect you to deliver them... free of course?" pele
"No i'm just posing with them, they're not yours either!"
"What is it?" pele whispers
"A steering wheel!" whispered back
"Ah what a cute steering wheel, why thankyou thankyou i've always wanted a cute steering wheel, i am honoured to accept it!" pele
"You're too kind, so when can i expect you to deliver it... free of course?" pele
"No i'm just showing it to you, its not yours! Oh god in heaven!!! er... have you met montoya yet?!"
"No?!" pele
"Well follow me, i think he's got a present for you!"
"Will i like it?" pele
"Yes, but not as half as me!"
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