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The Ron Dennis Diaries Part II
Dear Diary,
After 3 bloody months and 11 and a quarter bloody days, i finally managed to
claw open my coffin lid... only to find that the jokers had concreted me in!
luckily it only took me another 4 minutes to dig my way through... well they're
as bad at making concrete as they're at making cars, thank god :)
RD
Dear Diary,
I can't understand it, every night i put my old hair under my pillow, just like
all the rest of the good little boys, but the hair fairy never ever comes...
it seems i can't give it away. why? :(
RD
Dear Diary,
Today adrian told me that he wants to be an astronaut... so i took him to the
attic and kicked him out the nearest window. i tell you he's such a dreamer...
with any luck the fall should do him good... with any luck it'll bring him back
to earth Ha Ha! norby as usual asked if he could tag along... so i put him out
the attic window too Yah Ha-Ha!
RD
Dear Diary,
I don't know... i'm feeling kind of off today, more so than lately... well its
got so bad i can't stop throwing up... i've really got to do something about
my B.O. i can't bloody stand it anymore... its bad enough looking like an open
grave, its quite another smelling like one too.:(
norby says i could always get a job down the yogurt factory... says i'm really
good at making milk curdle... funny that, as his face makes my fist curdle :)
RD
Dear Diary,
We had another test today, DC went like the blazes and broke all the track records...
not bad considering it was only half a tank of fuel... so i've ordered adrian
to use a full tank next time he sets light to him. the one thing i hate about
this, is when we have to put him out afterwards... i tell you he's never satisfied,
he screams like a woman that he's on fire, and screams ten times worse when
we try to stamp it out. :( norby suggested we use our extinguisers... but i
said no way, not again... last time the place stank like rotten piss and fag
ash for months. :(
RD
Dear Diary,
DC came round today... well he'd been out since the test and demanded to know
where the rest of his face was... well i didn't have the heart to tell him...
it kinda melted in the fire and dripped off... and well it seemed a pity to
waste it, so i turned it into a nifty little gear knob. :) he just wouldn't
take no for an answer, so i had to give it back... well i kind of gave it back...
tell the truth i taped to his head. i can't understand why he's still angry
with me... i think it makes him look distinguised... deformed, but distinguisingly
so:) i offered to hammer it out, but he just ran out the house like a lunatic...
just no pleasing some people :(
RD
Dear Diary,
I had that dream again today... everyone was laughing at me... well i think
it was a dream?! :(
RD
Dear Diary,
Adrian said that he thinks this years car is a winner... i said i think he thinks
this years car is a winner too... then i said if i think he thought that he
thinks this years car was a loser, i'd kick his arse up and down the paddock
:) norby just kicked ten bells out of him... as an advance. :)
RD
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